What I hate about full-time positions is that it starts becomes a routine. And I get bored.. which cuts off the creative flow. My day-to-day life was me sitting at my desk for several hours typing away on my computer and analyzing garments. My time was precious to me, so I would use my lunch break to work on new sketches and work towards my passion. I would also take some time off from doing my work to learn more about patterns by a very skilled and talented patternmaker, who I consider now my friend. I tried to change up my days as much as I could and see what valuable experiences I could take from it. An amazing opportunity was given to me which I'm so excited to do {stay tuned!} But within all that, being around the same people every day, hearing the gossip, politics, people's egos, and daily complaints has caused me to become a little irritable, negative, critical, and judgmental. In the beginning I was very good at blocking and draining all those nasty vibes, but over time it definitely built up again to the point where there wasn't enough of me to let it go. Next thing I know, I'm unable to think for myself or function correctly, and the most annoying part is me being unable to articulate my words... and get my point across.. ugh that sucks. I just find myself talking and talking without making any sense. There's just too much static noise in my head! And thankfully before it got louder, my contract was up! Even though I wanted to stay, feel safe, mostly to keep a steady paycheck, I knew deep down that my soul didn't want it. It was tired and needed a break. It was time to check in with myself again and get back to what I love doing the most.
So... basically my time is precious. The last two days I haven't gone out to see or talk to anybody. I can't talk without stuttering or stumbling over my words lol. My mind's a blur. But, it's the perfect time to unplug, get away, do things that make me happy. Like go to Disneyland, haha! My next plan is to try to land my dream job.. currently manifesting it.
In the next post I'm thinking of doing less words, and more imagery. My head space is just...
anyways, have a good week everyone!
xx ss